If you count today, there are officially 11 shopping days left until Christmas! Isn’t that crazy? Isn’t that disgusting? Isn’t that reason enough to start panicking?! Sharpen your pencils ladies and gents, because the answer is D: ALL OF THE ABOVE.
Yes, we are closing in on that day which—along with school picture day—we put away our pride and let a camera snap unflattering photos of us because we know it will make our parents happy. Is there a more awkward brand of picture than a gift opening picture? I think not. Is there a more honest picture than a gift opening picture taken early on Christmas morning? Again, I think NOT.
So, in the spirit of “can you just look at me and smile PLEASE,” let’s dive into a second edition of: Christmas Gifts I Loved/Hated (As Told By Photos)…hopefully by next year I’ll have a catchier title.
You can read last year’s here
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: Okay now THIS—THIS RIGHT HERE IS AN OUTFIT. Listen Mom and Dad, I know it’s Christmas morning and all, but I can’t just sit around in this outfit at home. I have to get out there and start a dance crew. I’m gonna call up that guy Vanilla Ice Cream and see if he wants to collab.
What (Probably) Happened Here:
Dad: I’m going to take a picture of the tree.
Me: Did you want a picture of my bracelet?
Dad: In a minute.
Me: Here it is.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: I’m not ready to be a mother.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: Eat your heart out, Laura Ingalls. I’m about to sport the HECK out of this denim.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: HELP! HELP ME. SOS. FLARE GUN FLARE GUN FLARE GUN. THIS BABY IS A DEMON AND IT HAS TAKEN MY MIND HOSTAGE. CALL THE POLICE. THE FIRE MARSHALL. THE PARK RANGERS. EVERYONE.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: HEY, SLEEPYHEADS! I got myself out of bed. I dressed myself. I sat myself nicely on this wooden stool so you can photograph me. I even set the camera up on a tripod because this is my best angle. The LEAST you can do is get up so we can open some of these presents.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: What? Like you’ve never slept in a stocking to try and get a peak at the big man.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: Okay so the little hand counts minutes? No. Wait. The little hand counts hours. So if the little hand is pointing at 12, it’s 12 o’clock. Wait, but it seems like the big hand is also pointing at 12 when it’s 12 o’clock. So does the big hand count hours? I’m screwed.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: This is a cool bike. I can totally ride this bike, right? This is a great gift. An amazing gift. A gift for the ages. And I’m excited, right? I’m totally excited.
What My Sister is (Probably) Thinking Here: She’s scared sh*tless of that thing.
What I’m (Probably) Thinking Here: I’m super stoked about this jump rope I just got, but to be honest, I’m still raving about these sick pajamas I got for my birthday. Why is no one talking about The Lion King II? I thought it was a high quality film. And don’t even get me started on the music, I mean “One of Us?” “He Lives in You?” Talk about chills. But yeah, this jump rope is also pretty cool.
So cool that you have all those Christmas pictures handy to look at 🙂
I mean, come on…. you were so darn cute!
Love this annual tradition!!
I’m dying because I have so many similar childhood Christmas pics: me with a huge-ass dollhouse, me with Cabbage Patch kids, a hot wheels bike, etc. They’re such great memories and as usual, you put a unique spin on it & created a hilarious blog post. I lol’ed at “She’s scared sh*tless of that thing.”
Right! hahaha and while I’m usually annoyed in the moment when my dad wants to snap a picture of a gift I opened, I’m so thankful for all these masterpieces now. Also, I genuinely was scared shitless of that bike. To this day I still suck at riding bikes.