To All the Girls I’ve Ever Compared Myself To

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry for all the times I looked at you like an object when every moment of every day I argue why no one should ever do that.

I’m sorry for looking at your body and wishing I had the same one.

I’m sorry for making assumptions about you based on our differences.

I’m sorry for not paying enough attention to what you were saying because I was so worried about delivering a response that would make people like me the way they like you.

I’m sorry for talking about you positively at the expense of myself and I’m sorry about all the times I tried to build myself up with bricks that would tear you down.

I’m sorry for the negative comments about you that I might have agreed with, or failed to openly disagree with.

I’m sorry I tried to relate to you in a way that was dishonest to who I really am.

I’m sorry for not calling you beautiful more often and I’m sorry for deflecting any kind words you said to me rather than simply saying “thank you.”

I’m sorry for drawing generalized conclusions about “your type” instead of looking at you as an individual.

I’m sorry for blaming you for things that had only to do with me.

I’m sorry for being a less honest version of myself in exchange for being a less authentic version of you.

There is only one you, and there is only one me, and I can love them both for who they are and I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to figure that out.


This article was featured on HuffingtonPost


6 responses to “To All the Girls I’ve Ever Compared Myself To”

  1. miathelunatic Avatar

    I love this! I sometimes find myself comparing myself to others, whether in terms of body image or social “popularity”… and ” sorry for talking about you positively at the expense of myself” is just the truest thing I have ever heard. You are so right. Thank you for posting this!

    1. Thank you! We all need a little more love for both each other and ourselves 🙂

  2. i was so guilty of doing this is high school and college. Sometimes, if I’m not careful, i do it now too. it seems like we’ve become conditioned to tear each down in order to save ourselves. I don’t get it but I hope one day to sincerely compliment a woman and not pause, questioning whether I was sincere or not. Great piece!

    1. Couldn’t agree more, I think it’s a daily effort we all have to make. We have to remember we’re all just trying our best.

  3. This post is so wonderful and thought-provoking. It really made me think twice about my own actions and realize that I am guilty of all this too.

  4. Amazing, I had never really thought before that I also carry the guilt of comparing myself to others. I love it.

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