humor blog
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How to Survive Traffic in LA
My use of profanity growing up was very rare due to the strict policy my mom had against it. Even when my friends in school started using foul language, I stuck to “dang” and “oh man!” Over the years it didn’t change much—well, except when I got my driver’s license. Soon after, my car quickly Continue reading
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“Give Me the Drugs!!” said the Snorkeler (Hawaii Day 5)
I tend to be a bit of a worrier at times. In fact, it’s almost a hobby of mine to convince myself something bad is going to happen. That way, when everything goes smoothly it’s a nice surprise. I wouldn’t recommend this life strategy however. It’s a waste of Tums and Advil. Things are going Continue reading
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Koko, Chris and the Boar. (Hawaii Day 4)
Closed toed shoes were a requirement today, much to the disappointment of my flip flop loving toes. As I slid my socks on, I felt each freshly pedicured digit whimper beneath the confining fabric. It was like shutting the back door behind me and watching my dog stick her face up to the glass, begging Continue reading
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An Open Letter to Anyone About to Get Their First Mani/Pedi
Dear Polishless Patron, The first step is always picking a color. After the nice woman at the counter asks why you’ve come to see her, she will point to the wall of polishes, asking you to scan the seemingly millions of shades for our own personal Waldo. The seriousness of this choice is evident. Choosing Continue reading
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Arms Dead Forever (feat. The Gym)
It was a casual Saturday afternoon. I was contemplating a nap when my cousin Cory called with the invite. “It will be fun” he said, “come and at least try it.” With shoes laced and nervous sweat already bubbling on my neck, I made the drive over and found a parking spot next to a Continue reading
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Bob the Uber Driver
Last week my sister graduated from college. (YAY!) In celebration of this marvelous fact, we decided to go out on Friday night, for some dinner and some drinks. (DOUBLE YAY!) Now, when it comes to drinking, I’m almost always the designated driver. It’s a chosen role. I’m the person you can find giggling after the Continue reading
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Wawohap (The Game with a Gibberish Name)
For as long as I can remember I’ve participated in something I’ve now decided to call the “Wawohap” game. Unfamiliar? Maybe that’s because it’s never had a name until exactly one sentence ago. Wawohap as in “what would happen” is a distant cousin of the “what if” game. You know, that daydreamy game of regret Continue reading
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Have A Graph
As usual, my mind has run rampant this week with thoughts and ideas and goals and cravings for Cinnamon flavored cereal. But to keep things fresh, I’ve chosen to unload some of those thoughts and discoveries in the form of graphs. Why? Because a good chunk of me is a nerd Graphs are super fun! Continue reading
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How to Wake Up a Terminal Amputee with Days to Live
Pain. That was first and only thing I felt as I woke up Sunday morning. It was definitely in my legs, but I couldn’t identify which part. I tried to roll over, nothing happened. Was I paralyzed? No, there wouldn’t be a throbbing-like-I’d-just-been-shot pain if I was paralyzed. Had I been shot?! Who would shoot Continue reading
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Train of Thought (TOT): “Water”
I did a blog post a few weeks back talking about how we lose our train of thought on occasion. This got me thinking about the train of thought itself; about how it essentially has no sense of direction, and can take us places that we never intended to arrive at the start of a Continue reading
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