The other day I was listening to the Workin’ On it podcast with Meghan & Ryan Trainor, and their guest, Zach Pincince. At one point in the conversation, Zach said something that stuck out to me. It was a little nugget that made a piece snap together in my mind.
I’m going to expand on the idea that Zach gave.
You are at a party with some friends. It’s nothing crazy. You are moving from conversation to conversation, catching up with people you know, and introducing yourself to a few people you don’t. You are relaxed and having a good time. Then, during one conversation, someone tells you:
“You know you’re a purple unicorn, right?”
You scrunch your eyebrows together, confused. This is a ridiculous question. Obviously, you are not a purple unicorn. You know this to be a fact. So you shake your head, trying not to laugh, and you let the person continue on their merry way.
In the aftermath, you probably tell this story to anyone and everyone who will listen, whenever it pops into your mind, but it probably doesn’t make you question who or what you are. You don’t drive home that day (or any day after) thinking, what if I AM a purple unicorn? You likely just shake your head with a smile and think, that was such a weird thing to say.
Now let’s imagine a different scenario.
You are at that party with your friends. Moving from conversation to conversation. It is a run of the mill social gathering. But then, during one conversation, someone tells you:
“You know you don’t deserve any of the things you have, right? You know you’re not good enough? That you never will be?”
Do you still scrunch your eyebrows together in confusion? Do you laugh it off as something outrageous? Or do you blink your eyes a few times, letting the words wash over you?
On your drive home, are you still thinking about it? Are you letting those words repeat over and over in your head, each time letting yourself believe them a little bit more? Are you rationalizing it? They wouldn’t have said that if it wasn’t at least a little bit true, right?
For me, I would live out these scenarios exactly like this. I would laugh off the comment of being a purple unicorn, and I would let the comment that I’m not enough slice me into a million pieces.
Because the latter is something I’m afraid of being true. It is something that, at least a small part of me, believes to be true already.
Paolo Coelho said, “You are what you believe yourself to be.”
Which means that if I believe that I’m not enough, then, to me, I am never going to be. If that person walks up to me at that party, I’m going to hear their words as the truth—as proof that I’ve been right all along.
But, if I work to believe that I am enough—even though passing thoughts might say otherwise—if I fight to believe THAT as the truth, then it is, and that person might as well be calling me a purple unicorn.
In theory, both scenarios should end with you shaking your head, laughing in disbelief that this person would say something so ridiculous. Because both scenarios should trigger the same reaction, the same red flag, the same scrunched eyebrows.
Instead of waiting for someone to tell me I’m not enough, I want to learn and ultimately believe all the reasons why I am. I want to be able to stand on my own two feet, knowing what’s true and what isn’t, and I want to have the courage and confidence to defend that truth.
I want you to have that too.
So remember, you are not a purple unicorn (unless you want to be).
Let that weird, obvious fact be the thing that actually reminds you who you are—enough, worthy, able, etc.
Let it be the strangest, cutest battle cry against the insecurities beneath the surface, and the enemies that might be waiting around the corner.
I am not a purple unicorn, and neither are you, but we are so many good things, so many great things, so many things to be proud of.